Friday, August 18, 2006

Alex phones in another blog entry...


"...Hello? Is anyone there?"

Here’s photographic proof that I'm still alive, even though I haven't updated in a while. (There ought to be a current newspaper in the picture to prove that it's recent, but whatever.) Sorry for abandoning you, dear reader, but I've been frolicking about being sickeningly in love and haven't had a chance to post. It takes a lot of time and effort to be sickeningly in love. You and your beau spend all your free hours whispering sweet nothings into each other's ears on Ferris wheels, looking starry-eyed whilst sharing plates of spaghetti in restaurants that have candles in wine bottles, and calling each other "Pookie" in between PDAs so OTT that they cause those in close proximity to vomit a little in their mouths. There's no time at all for sitting hunched over a computer when there's all those piña coladas to drink and all that rain to get caught in, y'dig?

Anyway, I didn't check in to make you horribly, horribly jealous (...well, not only to make you horribly, horribly jealous), I also have an ethical conundrum that I need advice on. So, here's a poser for you: would it be lame of me to dress as Catwoman to the Arts Ball? Yeah, that's right; I'm going to the Melbourne Uni Arts Ball. Seems kind of wasted on me seeing as I'm not an alcoholic, or a ho, but what can you do? Anyway, I really want to go as the most fatale of felines, but I don't like to (consciously) think that I'm dressing to give strangers their jollies. So, what should I do? Should I just stop my whinging and take my cues from teen girl culture when picking a costume? If Mean Girls taught us anything it's that in certain social situations it's completely normal to get about in lingerie and some kind of animal ears. Or should I have a little more R-E-S-P-E-C-T for myself? You tell me...

In other news, I have 4 days to find a catsuit, ears and a whip. Eeek.

15 Comments:

Blogger James said...

Is it a themed Arts ball, Alex? Maybe superhero themed?
If not then go for it. You don't need to follow any lame fashion or common sense trends.

7:47 PM  
Blogger divinetrash said...

The theme of the ball is 'All Things Evil'. (Catwoman in't really evil, just kind of crazy and misunderstood, but oh, well.) It's not really a fashion or common sense thing, I just don't want to feel like I'm dressing to excite men, if you see where I'm coming from...

8:24 PM  
Blogger ManicLovely said...

Arts ball= lame
Catwoman= lame
And I know that all that witty, sarcastic banter about 'love' is pretty much spot on for your current relationship.
I swear if I have to look at you staring into each others eyes one more time I think I'll skip town.

Have fun at the Arts ball sparky, I know you'll go as catwoman anyway.

9:04 PM  
Anonymous sebatty man said...

Wait a sec. Let me just visualise this one.
-Alex
-Lanky, Lovable Alex
-Lanky, Lovable Alex with her lovely long legs
-Lanky, Lovable Alex with her lovely long legs in a skin tight black vinyl cat suit with freaky feminine felion ears and a kinky whip and no doubt wearing a ultra perky bra and you can probably make out her nipples too....Argghhhh
(Ahem), Okay I see your dilemma.
Well if you do choose to shamelessly and proudly unleash your sexual being, just make sure you include some of those thimble claws so you can scratch out the eyes of any villian who gets a little too jolly.

sebo Macsebseb

7:16 PM  
Blogger Daniel said...

There seems to be a third, as-yet-unmentioned solution to your dilemma: who said Catwoman had to be sexy? The possibilities are endless. Catwoman with real fur/hair? The one-off special "Oh man, she's REALLY let herself go" Catwoman? I know she was featured in one of those editions. What about Catwoman suffering from Catwoman furballs? Or 'recently spayed Catwoman'?

Alternatively, you could just go with the most likely real-life alternative Catwoman. That is, the Catwoman you are most likely to find at your local S&M club. That's right: Catwoman with just a little bit too much bulge.

9:35 PM  
Blogger ManicLovely said...

Seb?! EWWW. Please don't hit on my friends.

And Alex, whats with this post all on the side? I can't read some of it. Has your dad overworked your pooter?

2:15 PM  
Blogger chox said...

I know my comment is a little bit late, but can I just say that dressing as Catwoman is a great idea, especially seeing as your costume is DA BOMB!

I can see your point about titillating strange Arts types. But to be honest Al, you probably already titillate them just by being and dressing as your sexy self. I liked Dan's ideas about different versions of Catwoman. I might add Feral Catwoman, or, at the risk of sound like a lame-ass lame-o comic book fan loser (aka my ex-boyfriend who I don't really think is a loser) Thunder Catwoman.

Wow. Talk about intertextual.

CHOX

5:23 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You can probably expect some powerfully slurred verbal passes from limping dipsomaniacs with woodrot bourbon-breath and dicks jammed up to their navels, but that's OK, right? Should be fun.

Probably I should be fretting like a bankrupt quadriplegic about the whole thing but the last ball I went to, I wore this nice silk bolero, tasselled garter belt and patent gloves, and - to an almost hurtful degree - the guys didn't give me a second look. They only go for the food, I guess.

9:47 PM  
Anonymous lucy said...

hey alex, i know this i really late considering the arts ball was one day and a week ago, but im glad you went as cat woman, coz you looked hot hot hot, and not in a im hitting on you kinda way... btw that comment by daneil was hilarious! i particularly liked the part about catwoman choking on furballs.
put some pics up so the blogging community can see you looking hot hot hot.

1:21 PM  
Blogger chox said...

Alex! Why you no write new blog entry???

I miss you!

Love Chox xxx

3:20 PM  
Blogger Lucy said...

hey al,
thanks for the comment! and the vote of confidence. dont know how good or funny it will be but it will definately be to the MAX! how do i create links so i can link you to me??

11:07 PM  
Anonymous Chiara said...

Ooh, love! I know all about that, for I too am in love! I think we should get together and talk about how great it is to be in love and how blissfully happy we are and how wonderful our respective lovers are, and who we can set our poor tragic single friends up with so that they may rise out of their pathetic lonesome existences and become self-actualised human beings like ourselves. Yes?

(I just worked out how to make things to like this. Can you tell?)

1:56 PM  
Blogger divinetrash said...

Chiara, I love you. You are a total crack-up. And I completely agree; the rest of our friends will be unfulfilled and made to wallow in their own misery until we fix them. Tragically, some of them even think that they're happy as they are, and have no use for love! (:-0) However, I have no time to do anything about it, because I am in love. Maybe when I'm single again, OK?

Meanwhile, Alex Mattress misses you and your killah sense of humour. We must meet in reality! The blogosphere is not enough to convey the full force of either of our personalities!

8:50 PM  
Anonymous Chiara said...

Yes! I want to see people! And you're people! Good people! But I got a new phone and have lost all my numbers! So I've been reduced to waiting for people to msg me so that I can interrogate them about their identity and then store their number! All this has done is reinforce how little I am loved and how much I am hated (and indeed, how many worms I must consume)! In fact, I've been hunched at the computer for days, pathetically whimpering to myself and refreshing your blog in the hope that you'd acknowledge me! And now that you have I'm unable to stop using exclamation marks! Argh!!!!

1:47 AM  
Blogger divinetrash said...

Darling Chiara; you actually have very good taste in music. Your complete disregard for hooks is disappointing, but that's all I can fault. As I mentioned in the text msg I sent you, I oh-so excitedly attempted to be the first to comment on your charming new "blog". However, Last FM, for reasons unknown, wouldn't let me. (Perhaps because I refused to download the software.) But I want it known that I went to the trouble of creating a profile with an audio scrobbler service just so I could communicate with you on your cyber-turf... You really ought to feel proud.

Hoping you msg me back, (I trust you are at the same number) so we can catch up. It's good to have another hothothot young thing in the blogosphere. I was getting lonely.

11:52 PM  

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